All About Your Child

Remember the post about Allan’s friend’s daughter, who is on the verge of being suspended from school? Allan’s friend invited us for dinner with his family. Nothing in particular, just want to get to know each other’s family members since they are working so closely together now.

Allan and I were so eager to meet them, especially the problematic teenager. But she did not come. The dad was telling us the story behind her MIA…

“I told her to dress up to have dinner with my friends. She said, ‘I don’t feel like going. I will have instant noodles for dinner instead.’ I am that kind of dad – I give you back whatever attitude you present to me. Since you are so-not-interested. So I shall give the so-not-interested attitude back to you.

I gave the maid S$3.00, nothing more, nothing less. Just enough for the maid’s dinner. 5 minutes ago, she called my wife and asked where were we. She obviously regretted her decision for not leaving the house with us. She said she went down to the coffee-shop to look for us, but could not find us there.

My wife told her we went to another place for dinner, where she had to take a bus or taxi to reach us. I told my wife, ‘don’t need to explain so much to her, tell her to have her own dinner, don’t bother to come, we are not going to ‘beg’ her to come. She can do whatever she like.’

She definitely overheard the dad’s words. Slammed down the phone.

I am her dad. Don’t expect me to beg her or coax her to come for a dinner. Even if she is here. She’ll be putting on her ‘black-face’. Mind you, she is already 14 years old. She is no longer a small kid like this younger one (pointing to his younger daughter-4 years old), whereby we still need to educate her what is right and what is wrong.

So let her be then. Anyway she hardly talks to us now, or rather to me now, ever since what happened.”

The dinner was fantastic. Not the food but the 2 families enjoyed chatting with each other. I chose to be with the kids rather than chatting about adult stuff. I loved their younger daughter at 1st sight. She reminded me of a girl I really love when I was teaching in the child care centre.

So the 3 kids were going crazy with me, playing ‘pretend’. Just when I felt so engrossed playing with them, Allan’s friend asked (the question that so many asked whenever they see me with kids), “Why don’t you go back to be a child care centre teacher? I love your patience and the way you communicate with kids. I can imagine how popular you were when you were a teacher in the past.”

Allan answered for me, “Spending time with kids can really be tiring, especially when they are not yours. Every Sunday, we would go over to my mom’s place and all my nieces would stick to her like a leech. When we leave my mom’s place at night, her battery is completely flat.”

I remember the day when my supervisor told me to consider being a full time child care teacher, “Its amazing how well you can take care of kids and how much the kids love you when you are still so young (was 17 years old then), you may want to consider doing this after your Polytechnic education. But as we know, loving kids and taking care of them is totally a different story altogether. You may find that the salary does not justify the hard-work you put in too (their starting pay were only S$800 then). You are really a great helper, ‘cos you can relate to kids of any age, that’s why you fit in so well here. Whenever a teacher is on leave, you can fit in, irregardless of which age group of kids the teacher is in-charge of. Do consider.”

My reason is simple – I just want to dedicate my time and energy for my own kids.

Too selfish? Maybe. But my decision is that for now. I love to spend time with children, be it my own or not. But to give my commitment, only to my own boys. Who knows, maybe, just maybe, if my boys no longer feel they need me as much as they do now, I may consider going back to be a child care teacher….ooops! By then they may consider me too-old-for-the-job.

Am I really missing out on a career?

Keatkeat’s Excitement:

This was the hat we bought specially for him for today’s trip to learn more about plants and flowers. It was one of the requirements for this excursion. The others include bringing, snacks, water bottle, raincoat and a handkerchief.

Its was really easy to wake the 4-year-old this morning at 7am. All I need to say was, “I don’t think the school bus to the Mandai Orchid Garden will wait for you, if you are late.” Immediately, he sits up like a robot, went straight to the bathroom and brushed his teeth. They should have more of such trips, then I won’t need to crack my head for new ideas to get the kid out of bed every monday to friday.

Before we left the house, Keatkeat insisted on taking photos for him when he is going up the bus, so I brought the camera down. I was the only parent who did that. So you can imagine that look from the other parents.

I forgot to check the settings on the digital camera. It was on video mode. When I finally realised my mistake, it was too late. He was already on the bus. This photo was a screen capture from the video shot that lasted for 3 seconds, because I was pressing the button so many times. Its quite blur, sorry.

Here’s the tired boy after 2 hours, coming down from the bus with the help of his English Teacher Mdm Normah.

Keatkeat’s summary of the trip:

“Mommy, there were alot of mosquitoes at the Orchid Garden. See?! I got 3 bites. Chen Lao Shi (Chinese Teacher, Miss Chen) applied lotion for me…… Didn’t do anything, just walk, walk, walk and walk…….. Kayong got lost there. He cannot find us. Mdm Normah go look for him. He didn’t cry. But Mdm Normah was very angry and scolded him…… I saw bees too. Flying in the flowers…… The floor there is very dirty, look at my shoes (the sides were covered with mud)………. Then I saw 3 blue cars at the carpark too (my car-crazy boy never forgets to notice cars wherever he goes). That’s all, nothing already.”

This was the souvenir he brought back. Seeing it in another way, this tiny pot cost S$13.00 (the cost to be on this trip)

Mommy: “What’s the name of this plant?”

Keatkeat: “Don’t know.”

Mommy: “So, what do you want to call it?”

Keatkeat: “Water plant”

Mommy: “Why?”

Keatkeat: “Because I need to water the plant.” (Hmmm….sounds logical ya?)

“Oh no, Mommy, the plant shh…shh… (pass urine)”

“Ok, that’s enough water for you today, you drank too much. That’s why you shh…shh…so much. I will give you water again tomorrow.”

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My Excitement:

Finally I get to see the SUN and NO RAIN after 9 days of dark clouds. Yeah! Yipee! Those 9 days were horrible. The clothes were still wet even after hanging up for almost 24 hours.

Look at everyone, taking this opportunity to sun their clothes.

Some even gave their birds a ‘Sun-tan’. (Picture below) 2nd column from the right, 3rd unit from the bottom. See the 2 bird cages in brown?

Too many clothes to hang after so many rainy days, people tried to do stunts with their bamboo. (See photo below) Far right, 2nd unit from the bottom.

It was so sunny and windy (see photo below, you can see my boys clothes flying high), my washing machine washed 3 full loads of clothes. Yes, that many clothes were left unwashed after so many gloomy days. Hmmm….maybe that’s why my kitchen starts to smell weird. Ewww….

I am so glad that the Sun and Wind are here today, ‘cos every Saturdays and Sundays are reserved for my sister to wash her working clothes.

“sorry washing machine, you must be exhausted! I can’t imagine life without you…”

The smell of clothes that have been sun bathed……..(inhaling) its just so assuring (that you clothes are really dry and clean)…….I am in love with that smell…….Hmmmm…..