Will I become another person?
Child, Parenting, School-study May 4th, 2009Yesterday, my MIL was especially pissed when my 2nd BIL and SIL didn’t come over for the usual Sunday gathering. MIL forgotten that this week was exam week for my eldest niece and it is a common practice that the family DO NOT COME OVER during exam week.
Being the only child, all hopes are pinned on her, and so is pressure. *sigh* 2nd SIL insisted that she told my MIL, but MIL can’t recall. Lots of food remained untouched during lunch and she didn’t like it; even though NONE of us minded eating the same yummies again for dinner.
I’m not a parent who is very academic focused when it comes to my kids. I did pretty well in school, I should say, but it was because I had NO pressure from home to perform well. *laugh* Its the same for my sis too. I think this weird genes runs in the family. The only tutor she ever had was because SHE WANTED TO BE TUTORED; whereas most of our friends were sent to tuition centers because THE PARENTS INSISTED.
Keatkeat and Binbin are not in Primary School yet. Keatkeat will be, next year. Then, will I become another person? Will I start giving him pressure too? Will I become like my SIL, not going over for family gathering during exam weeks?
I don’t know. I hope not.
Allan said “No, we should never be.”
I agree. Cos’ the old folks are really old and you never know when will it be the last gathering.
Piority. Piority. What’s yours? Family or not? There is never right or wrong. Life is just full of too many grey areas. If life is as simple as black and white, living would be too boring. Everyone has different piorities in life.
Sometimes you may think, “Oh please, its just for a week, what harm can it do?” But what if that week was the last, will you live with regrets?
I would.
May 4th, 2009 at 12:47 pm
honestly, really, honestly, i am quite bochup abt jaimie’s learning progress now coz i know she is able to learn well. if she displays signs of not able to catch up, i dont think i can sit down and continue to do nothing….
primary sch seems to tough now!!!
May 4th, 2009 at 2:21 pm
but they still need to have their 3 meals a day right? so they can just come for a lunch or a dinner. give that poor only child a break.
lings last blog post..A Very Helpful Son
May 4th, 2009 at 2:23 pm
forgot to add ….
I know you will NOT give your boys pressure.
You will still be the same Angline when your boys attend primary school. I know. :)
lings last blog post..A Very Helpful Son
May 4th, 2009 at 3:32 pm
Well, my girl just started Primary 1 this year and i can understand how yr BIL/SIL feel.
During exam week, every second counts. I think since yr BIL/SIL family has been eating together every weekends, missing one meal is ok.
By eating at home, the most you spend is an hour, this will give your niece more time to revise her work.
From experienced, i know going out for lunch/dinner will simply take at least 3 – 4 hours (very precious time), plus travelling time. Then when the child comes home, she will be too tired to revise.
For P1 SA – they have about 14 units to revise for each subject (Englsih/Math), then there also Mother tongue. If yr niece is in high primary, i believe she still has to do science. So it all add up.
Just sharing my view.
astees last blog post..??? – ????
May 4th, 2009 at 8:17 pm
Aurora is in high school so her exams are hard so she does spend extra time studying for them. I try not to put pressure on her, she has enough of that just being a teenager. I’m happy with B’s.
May 5th, 2009 at 4:59 am
I don’t think you will change, Angeline, and I don’t think you should. While it’s important to do well in school, many kids (like me!) don’t perform well under pressure. I’m a former teacher, and I’m not a fan of pushing kids too hard.
Alisons last blog post..Prodigy
May 5th, 2009 at 8:27 am
I agree with Alison. When I look at my grown childrens’ classmates, and my own students, the fact is, the best students don’t always end up being the happiest or even the most “successful” adults. With my own children, I always told them that is they were happy with what they had done, that was good enough for me.
May 5th, 2009 at 9:59 am
well, i believe in consistency than last minute rush. With daily revision, my girls do not have to put in extra effort to study during exam period. they still lead their normal life style..revise, play, watch Tv…
anyway, how long can a lunch/dinner be?? the kids need a break too, so why not let this be their break from their “exam revision”?
Blessed moms last blog post..He Recognised Words!!
May 5th, 2009 at 10:38 am
Blessed mom,
and they are staying so near to each other.
Less than 5mins drive…
If only my 2nd SIL gets to read this…
but then again, *sigh* I guess her priority is just different from ours…
May 5th, 2009 at 11:32 am
I feel that by pressuring your kid to study doesn’t = better grades. Eating healthy during exam period and keeping healthy is more important..so that they can be focused during the exams.
Dominiques last blog post..Free the Whales- Jamie Rix (A Book Review)
May 5th, 2009 at 12:04 pm
I think each to their own way…..have to respect also…
But maybe just go for a short while to eat only and not stay for long….
May 5th, 2009 at 1:05 pm
I always believe study smart not hard :) I am not sure how i will be with my kids in future..but i sure do hope i can be a good mom and a role model to them.
May 5th, 2009 at 1:13 pm
I hope you remain the same don’t bug your children… :) well good performance always comes from low pressure and full support.. so you are going the right way.. I don’t know how I ll behave as my son is just one and a half years old, just keeping my fingers crossed.
jaanvis last blog post..Swine Flu
May 5th, 2009 at 1:15 pm
Be as you are, don’t bug your children.. :) good performance always comes from low presure and full support so you are going in the right direction… :)
jaanvis last blog post..Swine Flu
May 5th, 2009 at 1:16 pm
I guess that’s the Singapore’s lifestyle…. paper chase! That’s the reason my hubby refused to go work in Singapore again.
Actually, Singapore is so small and only takes minutes to arrives to any destination within town… why your BIL have to skip lunch gathering? They have to eat too during exam rite?
May 5th, 2009 at 1:17 pm
Be as you are, don’t bug your children.. :) good performance always comes from low presure and full support so you are going in the right direction… :)
May 5th, 2009 at 4:54 pm
like you said, there is never right or wrong…but i guess i wont pressure my kid(s) to score straight A’s (but if they do, then i would be even happier!) hahaha…
let them learn and hv fun as well…
btw, here’s wishing you a HAPPY MOTHER’S DAY in advance :-)
May 5th, 2009 at 11:05 pm
Don’t think too far yet, Angeline.
May 5th, 2009 at 11:57 pm
being from India, my style is study everyday an start revising well before the exam…
even my SIL back in India don’t visit my in laws when her son has exams…otherwise every weekend they are at my in laws place
personally i feel.. everyday study should allow time for a quick lunch with the family n some play rather spending the whole day / whole noon.. i would go…but leave earlier jus that i dont rush my kid at home for the next day exam.. he needs to relax at home too ..cos the nervousness should not creep into him jus cause he ‘s running out of time…
Also i would say Yuvan to finish up his revision well,so that we could take time off either at the parents/inlaws house.. m sure that wd work wonders with the kids.. wat say?
Suhanyas last blog post..Remembering Ayrton Senna
May 6th, 2009 at 7:19 am
The priority should be the good times together, the education will follow.
May 6th, 2009 at 9:47 am
I don’t mind but my hub think otherwise. To me, my girl needs to be put in effort daily and when comes to exam period, I will not have to pressure her. And during this period, I asked her to revise on what is taught.
LZmommys last blog post.."Bubbles"
May 8th, 2009 at 3:26 am
wow sound like it is more stressful for the parents than for the kids. Having the awareness may help to prevent you from becoming the type of parents you do not want to be :)
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