Tonight, I need to setup my stall at the bazaar. So I had to beg ask my mother-in-law to take care of them for a few hours while I do my setup in peace.

In the past, I sell my handmade accessories as a job. Now I am selling them as a duty. I need to clear them fast because I do not like to go through the moment where my kids show me the mummy-can-you-don’t-go-work kind of look whenever I drop them off at my mother-in-law house. I hate to see that look. I can feel how my kids feel, its the same kind of feeling as when my auntie told me that I had to stay with my parents for good (read my story).

In the past, it was a daily routine that they had to be deposited at my in-law’s house. They still gave me that kind of look then, but because they were so used to it, they hardly cry.

Ever since my sister-in-law became pregnant for the 3rd time, my mother-in-law could forsee that her 61 year old body will not be strong enough to take care of 5 kids, that’s including the unborn child. The baby was born last year May. So on by April, I had to stop my work completely already.

No matter how much argument we had in the past. My mother-in-law is a superwoman in to me. She took care of 4 young children, age newborn, 1, 2 and 4, housework, cook and everything else. She really deserves the family’s respect.

When my sis-in-laws 3rd child was born. That was the beginning of my new profession – full-time domestic manager. But I had lots of ready-made accessories, and lots of beads yet to be beaded up, I need to clear them, afterall I had been in this line for 6 years. So I discussed with my mother-in-law and she finally agreed to let me go for 1-3 days bazaar every alternate weeks at most.

Everytime when I had such bazaar, I will had to go through the ‘drama’ with my kids all over. Normally, a few hours after I left, my mother-in-law would call and say that they are back to their bubbly self again.

But today, the call was different. There was a crying child on the other side of the phone. It was Binbin. Through his sobbing and catching of breath, I could roughly figured out words like, “mummy…hug me…carry me…want to …go home…”

My heart was so sour, I really felt like calling the bazaar off! But I could not. Close friends know why….I needed to clear the stocks, yes, and I needed the cashflow too.

Next moment, I heard the sound of vomit. My mother-in-law took over the phone and said Binbin vomitted because he cried too much and the call was cut-off.

Sigh….hate this, don’t like to hear my baby cry. Ahhhh….. No parent would like to hear their baby cry!!!