Another Daddy-Mommy Talk

Parenting, School-study


Allan and I often sit together to refine our parenting style. Coming to a compromise is the ultimate aim. Yesterday was another round, but this time it was school-study focused.

As I had said over and over again, I am not that kind of Mommy who wants to give my children extra assessments apart from what the school gives. To me, a person has only ONE CHILDHOOD. I do not want my kids to spend their childhood under books and stress and pressure. To me, after completing school assigned worksheets, its time for the child to play and relax. Thus, that was exactly what I did for Keatkeat for the first 6 months in Primary School.

However, his teachers are unhappy. They feel that he should do more. They are more ‘unhappy’ with his results than I am happy with his scores. *sigh* The complaints from the teachers affected Allan and affected KeatKeat.

Now the man and the boy want to achieve the standard that the teacher wants. But to me, the leap from where KeatKeat is now and where his teachers expect him to be is too great.

I have always told my tuition kids’ parents when I was still doing tuition many many years ago, “Please be realistic. Let your child learn at the pace that he/she can absorb. If the level of understand is not up to a level, even if I give more assignments, your child will still be up to his level. Forcing will only push him further away and create negativity towards learning. That is the last thing I want.”

The Spirit of Wanting to Learn Must Never be Negative.

So ever since we heard the complaints from KeatKeat’s teachers, Allan insisted that I should start doing tuitioning for him and at the level that his teachers want. *sigh*

It was a painful July and I had enough of awful teaching in August so far. I HATE TO FORCE MY CHILD TO LEARN AT A LEVEL THAT HE IS NOT UP TO YET!

Its painful for KeatKeat and Me!

Yesterday, I had enough. I want to put a stop to it. I sat down with Allan after a 2 hour of drilling with KeatKeat on how to write a READABLE composition, to prepare him for the composition test today.

I said, “Allan, I am NOT Happy. I am doing something that I do not like. I do Not like to force my children to do what they do not like and are not of their standard yet.  Although KeatKeat can speak proper English sentences but writing proper English sentences is still way off. Keatkeat’s foundation is horrible. He has problem with simple grammar and tense and you want me to teach him how to write compositions that is presentable? He cannot do it at this moment.”

Allan, “Then how? He cannot even write a decent composition. The way he writes a composition will not pass.

“To help him with his final year and NOT the composition test tomorrow, there is still time. I will start teaching him the basics; how to construct a grammatically correct sentence before I go into teaching him how to ‘beautify’ the sentence.” I replied.

I continued to say, “When his foundation is so weak, even if I give him all the tips on how to write an award winning composition, he cannot perform; because the way he construct a basic sentence is incorrect.”

*sigh*

So it was decided that from today onwards, there will be tuition from me for my Primary One boy for his English and Chinese every single day….

Oh Man! This is totally against what I believe in. School is tough enough, coming home with more school work to do is worse and now I have to give even more on top of what he already has?!

When will he get to PLAY??!! *Aargghhh*


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Kids and Facebook

Parenting

facebookAre you watching what your kids are playing on Facebook?

Today I received a Facebook message:

“hv u ever play vombie farm.
my credit bill rcvd for two mths,
charged me one hundred over dollars
convert fm usd mthly for playing this game
by the boys.
any knowledge of this game, is it got any auto buying while playing.”

*** My friend’s boys are only 5 and 7 years old.

As the world is so filled with all sorts of entertainment, it is so easy to find a ‘temporary nanny’ just to look after our kids for that few minutes or even an hour.

It used to be

“Go play with your Toys Or “Go watch Cartoons…... Let me (parent/nanny/guardian) do some work first.”

Now it has become

“Go play with your Facebook games. Let me (parent/nanny/guardian) do some work first.”

The PC or the Internet has become our ‘temporary nanny’ which we could easily seek help from, so that we could get a few minutes or even a few hours of break from the noisy little ones.

This ‘temporary nanny’ has proven its worth time and time again. First, ‘she’ has the ability to capture the kid’s attention 100%! Next, ‘she’ brings joy to them; you hear laughter and never cries. Of course, you must be fair, it has to be one PC to one child. ‘She’ is so popular, your kids would fight over ‘her’.

But what could be the damage?

Poorer eyesight? Autism? Social and communication skill decreased? Bonding with the family reduced? And/or even the lost in monetary terms, just like the message I received this morning.

Do you really know what your child is doing on the Internet?

Do you give them 100% freedom to do whatever they want on social media sites like Facebook?

Do you put restrictions on what they can play or do?

Do you?

‘She’ is a great nanny, but ‘She’ is still a non-living thing afterall, should you have full trust in ‘Her’? What is the relationship between your Kids and Facebook?

Copyright © 2007-2024 All About Your Child. The contents on this blog are the sole property of the author, Angeline Foong, and may not be used or reproduced in any manner without consent. All Rights Reserved. 6 Comments »