To me as a Mommy, (some call me cruel or dangerous Mommy) I do not like to keep repeating an instruction or a warning. Even if that thing could pose some danger, I would consider letting the child learn his lesson the hard way.

First week of school, because Binbin did not follow his teacher’s instructions, he almost lost his toe to that heavy wooden block. “Hold this with two hands, children.” was what the teacher instructed (so said the teacher herself).

But Binbin chose to show off his macho muscles and held it with one hand. Great! And THIS was his reward for not listening to his teacher’s advice.

Second week of school, nope, nothing bloody happened in school, but OUT of school. We went for sushi. Binbin tried to poke his finger UNDER the sushi belt, where unfriendly sharp edges were obvious.

Warned him verbally 2 to 3 times. Explained the possible dangers. Pulled his hands away. He obeyed. Nothing happened.

The craving for the 99cents sushi was still in him and so we went again the next day. This time, I refused to warn him more than once. A full (previous) day of warnings plus one final one on the day itself, to me, is abusing the purpose of giving warnings.

You know how nagging would end up on deaf ears, don’t you? Rather, the lesser the frequency of certain sentences, the more the child values it (sometimes).

My parenting mentality of ‘Make the Child Feels, instead of Make the Child Listens.’ decided to take over the protective Mommy. I Watched him poked his finger UNDER the belt.

Attempted Once, Twice and “Ouch!” His face turned white. He grabbed onto his index finger. Then his face turned red.

“This is what you get when you do not listen to Mommy’s instructions.” I fired at him. Heart aching but not even caressing or checking his injury.

That’s me. I want the kid to really feel. NOPE. Not the pain. But the sense of not being loved.

The 4 year old started to cry.

“Why are you crying?” I asked. ‘Cos I KNOW this boy has super high threshold for pain, so I knew its NOT pain that was causing the tears to flow.

“Because you scold me….” Sobbed away.

Expect me to pull him over and hug? NO way! If it was that easy, he would never learn the principle of obedience.

“Did I ask you to put your finger inside? Or did I ask you NOT to put your finger inside?” I probed.

“Cannot put inside….” sob sob sobbed.

“When you don’t listen to Mommy, what happens?”

“Pain. Got Blood.”

“So what now?”

“Sorry Mommy…”

Yup! That’s the magical word. Pulled him over, laid his head on my lap and his tears dried up like as if he was under the hand dryer. *eyes rolled* My only fear was the sharp edges might be rusty, so we did wash the wound up well.

Now, his finger is as good as new! But his toe Hhhmmm… not too pleasant looking yet, the skin is growing ‘all over the place’ to cover up the big wound…. *sigh* There goes the lesson on the importance of instructions….

***So, Blessed mom, your question answered. *wink*